Recovery isn’t a detour: it’s the work
Back in February I had some pretty major surgery. Last week (five months later), I felt my “old” energy levels suddenly return.
So let’s talk about the myth of the snap back.
You’ve just had surgery. Or given birth. Or gone through something else physically and/or emotionally seismic.
And suddenly people start asking when you’ll “get back to normal.”
Back to your old jeans.
Back to your workouts.
Back to your inbox, your optimism, your pre-“event” productivity levels.
Or if they don’t ask directly, you feel the subtle expectation.
It’s well-meaning, sometimes. But also – pretty unhelpful... because healing isn’t a snap. It’s a long, boring, non-linear slog through swelling, scar tissue, exhaustion, rage, and whatever mysterious setback your body (/organisation) has decided to surprise you with this week.
And the idea that your value lies in how quickly you can erase the evidence of what you’ve just survived?
Let’s bin it.
Here’s what helps instead:
Permission to go slow
You’re not behind. You’re recovering.
Respect for what your body and brain are doing
Every nap, every weird craving, every “I can’t today” is part of the process, not weakness.
Support that doesn’t hinge on performance
Not “you look great!” or “you’re amazing!” Just “what do you need?” and “I’ve got you.”
When a team’s just been through a brutal restructure, merger, or crisis, asking them to “snap back” to business as usual is like asking someone to bench press the day after abdominal surgery.
Healing takes time – and may never look like a return to the old normal. Trust takes work. And leadership? It starts with naming what’s true, creating safety, and allowing space to rebuild, not just resume.
So if you're being nudged to snap back - physically, emotionally, or professionally - try this instead:
Set a boundary (even a quiet one)
Reframe “not at my best” as “still in recovery”
Lower the bar where you can, and raise a brow where you must
You don’t have to pretend you’re fine just because the meeting invite says you should be.
Recovery isn’t a detour from the work.
Right now, it is the work.
I work with senior professionals who want to lead with greater clarity and influence, even or especially in messy or challenging environments. If that’s you, get in touch.
Until next week, take care of yourself and others
Madeleine
I help accomplished professionals untangle difficult career questions so they can thrive in work and life.
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