Are you too easy to work with?

• Is it a good idea to soften disagreement to help your message land?

• To be flexible about your own priorities to accommodate someone else's?

• To smooth over tensions, rather than allow a disagreement to escalate?

Of course. These are valuable interpersonal skills, particularly in leadership. Nobody wants to work with someone who's unnecessarily difficult, combative or obstructive.

How about these questions, then...

• Is your message’s substance surviving that diplomacy? Or have you obscured what really needs to be said?

• Is the flexibility reciprocal? Or are you consistently the one absorbing the inconvenience, extra work or compromise?

• What's the cumulative cost? An individual concession may be advantageous. A pattern of concessions may not be.

But – and especially for women leaders facing the expectation that being liked is seen as inversely proportionate to being respected, a bind that is not typically applied to men – this can be a tricky path to navigate, with real consequences.

How to know when being easy to work with has become a liability?

That second set of questions can be a useful diagnostic lens. Keep an eye on the patterns. Being easy to work with is a strength; just not at any cost.

Do you feel like you’re being too “nice” at work, but struggling to find that balance? Get in touch and let’s explore how to help you through that – and share this with someone you think may resonate!

Until next week,

Madeleine

I help accomplished professionals untangle difficult career questions so they can thrive in work and life.

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