Forget goals, focus on your purpose
Many people make New Year’s resolutions to set goals: to get healthier, to spend more time with their family and friends, to grow their careers… and most have forgotten those goals by February. As important as it is to set goals, it’s even more important to understand why you set them in the first place.
The blank slate of any coming year can make goal setting daunting. The swirling uncertainty of the omicron surge is certainly adding to the complexity for many of us right now in January 2022. That makes goal-setting even harder than usual. Why? Your goals are the "what" – the stuff you’re going to do. The “what” can and will change depending on circumstance. In a time like this, your plan to get to the gym 3 times a week may or may not be feasible.
Your purpose is your "why" and this will be relatively constant. Use that grounding sense of purpose to help you navigate 2022. That way, as things change, you can use that “why” as a guide to help you adapt.
You have the power to define your own purpose
You don’t have to wait for someone else to tell you why you’re here. You can define your own personal values and decide what kind of impact you want to make. What is it that makes life worth living? Why are you here? What matters most in life? Thinking about these questions gives us perspective and helps us prioritise what really matters.
Define what you want
As circumstances change (they will) and chaos hits (it will), a specific goal may no longer be achievable. If that goal feels like your be-all and end-all, this can be devastating. But, if it is a stepping stone towards achieving your deeper purpose, you will find it easier to recalibrate and keep moving.
In order to write a plan that has real meaning, you first need to know what you want. There's no point in writing out a plan for something that isn't actually important to you.
Take some time away from your computer and think about why you want that thing, whatever it is. If you got it, what would it give you? And if you had that, what would it allow? And if you had that, what would it give you then? Digging a few or several layers deeper can really help you get to the bigger intentions behind your wishes. You'll often find you end up with answers like "freedom", "happiness", "peace", "connection" - these are the big words that can form your true north.
Don’t wait for things to happen—make them happen
Once you have a greater sense of clarity about what matters most to you and what sets your heart ablaze with passion, don’t wait for change to find you. Go out and make it happen. If there are things in your life that aren’t bringing you joy—whether they be people or habits—focus more time and energy on growing close to those who inspire joy within you, as well as, to the extent you can, actively eliminating anything that might possibly be adding stress or unhappiness into your life.
Life’s so much more enjoyable when you worry less about things you can’t control and instead focus more of your energy on living each day to its fullest and making a positive impact in whatever ways that means for you.
The more you do it, the easier it gets
The best way to take advantage of a new year or goal setting period is to remember that it takes time to get better at almost anything you do. Whether it’s health or career improvement or just an overall feeling of greater positivity in your life, we need to recognise that life isn’t a sprint—it’s a marathon. Don’t expect quick results or immediate fulfillment; these things take time and consistency. Go into 2022 ready for change and focused on working towards long-term intentions. Before you know it, months will have gone by and those improvements will be becoming apparent in all areas of your life.
Just start
The hardest part is to start—but then momentum will build, you’ll rewire your habits and find you will be able to make changes in no time. Start today and I promise it will be worth it!
Now lest you get me wrong, I'm quite goal-oriented. I have to-do lists aplenty, I set targets and I like to achieve them. I'm not suggesting that those things can't be helpful - for me, the sense of clarity and structure that goals give me is extremely useful. The key, though, is that it only works when the goals are aligned with my deeper values.
Have you ever had a to-do item on your list that you just never get to? Chances are, it's because you don't really want to do it! (Derp - seems obvious now, doesn’t it) And that sense of murky stasis can really begin to bog you (me) down.
It’s easy to get paralysed by all of life’s goals and to-do lists—and completely miss out on living. If you find yourself feeling stressed or anxious about what you want to accomplish, ask yourself a few questions: Am I really doing what I want with my life? How do I want to feel? And how much of this will matter to me in ten years from now?
Remind yourself that priorities change over time and if something isn’t working for you, there is absolutely no shame in switching it up. It might take some trial and error but once you figure out what truly matters to you—it will be worth it. Remember that life is too short not to be living in alignment with what really matters to you.
2022, here we come!
Until next week,
Take care of yourself and others
Madeleine
I help accomplished professionals untangle difficult career questions so they can thrive in work and life.
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